On a chilly day, the TABLE Studios saw 16 elite contenders square off in a single-elimination competition, with glory and prestige on the line. Those contenders: Some of Pittsburgh’s finest craft beers.
A March Beer Bracket of Pittsburgh’s Best Breweries
To build excitement from the on-court NBA madness coming later this month, TABLE Magazine last week held its inaugural Beer Bracket. The rules were simple: Our panel of judges evaluated pairs of local, craft brews and decided which beer was superior.
The winner advanced. The loser went home. (In this case, home was a side table until it was inevitably consumed by a TABLE staff member.)
The results included some blowouts, some upsets and a number of very close matchups — until one brew emerged as champion.
Getting to Know the Judges
The spotlight was on the 16 competitors, but — much like the Olympics — the results were up to the judges.
A four-member panel assembled for a (mostly) impartial, (temporarily) sober assessment of the field. Leading the group — in spirit, if not in any official capacity — was Chef Jackie Page, a chef, caterer and bartender. Vitally, as she was quick to point out, Page is “officially a graduate of Point Park’s beer college,” having completed a course of study in beer appreciation and brewing techniques at the Downtown university.
Page was joined by RaeLynn Harshman Gigler, bar manager at Dish Osteria. “I’m thinking about talent,” she explained, “but I’m also thinking: What do I really want to drink now?”
This rubric stood in contrast to that of fellow judge Dan Gigler, a food writer who has covered restaurants and dining extensively for TABLE, Shady Ave, the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, and more. His standard of evaluation, he says, was “pure talent … this is when the top seeds come to play.”
Of note: Those last names are no coincidence. Dan and RaeLynn are married; while fallen competitors may have had cause to grumble about this close relationship, the two vowed not to collude on results. (Indeed, their bracket seemed to split more often than most judges, as Dan often supported an underdog.)
Rounding out the panel: Ethan Chmura, TABLE’s Advertising and Editorial Coordinator. The youngest of the judges, Chmura took the opportunity to increase his beer knowledge — and study under Page’s tutelage. Midway through the competition, she began tutoring her fellow judge on proper tasting techniques. “Sniff your beer first — what do you smell?” Chmura thoughtfully noted these instructions as Page continued: “Swallow your beer and push the fragrance out through your nose.”
While his study seemed earnest, Chmura admitted that he was choosing winners “purely off of taste.”
Elite Seeds Rise
All tastings were completed without the judges knowing what brew they were sipping — or even its brewery of origin. As offerings from New France, East End, Hitchhiker, Lolev, Dancing Gnome, Cinderlands, 11th Hour, and Grist House suited up and took the court, there were some competitive but clear-cut wins in the early rounds.
Just one round into the bracket, however, the picks became difficult. The judges split on a quarterfinal matchup between New France’s Something Analog and Lolev’s Samo Pilsner; the two equally matched pilsners left the panel deadlocked. A method for breaking the tie was debated. Initially, someone proposed a simple solution: “If there’s a tie, disqualify Ethan.”
Cooler heads prevailed, and a fifth palate was called in: this writer, in what may have been a breach of sportswriting ethics, sipped the brews to break the tie. (I opted for New France’s offering, helping it advance to the semifinal.)
As the competition continued, the judges persevered in the face of mild inebriation. Fatigue was not a factor, but the mental game remained paramount — particularly when the guests had to remember which unmarked glass contained which beer.
“It’s getting louder,” Dan Gigler reported. “We’re laughing a little more.”
The Finals
On the western side of the bracket, New France’s Something Analog faced Lustra, a standout pale ale from Dancing Gnome, in a semifinal matchup. On the eastern end, an upstart rose: Despite several judges admitting they were not normally a fan of the varietal, East End’s brown ale, Fat Gary, surged to a semifinal matchup against Lolev’s Lupula IPA.
Four different breweries, four different styles — and four formidable competitors.
Lustra, which had been a favorite throughout the tournament, continued its expected march to the finals, earning the support of three judges. Meanwhile, the Cinderella story continued: Fat Gary impressed three judges and toppled its favored foe. (The lone holdout in both semifinals: Dan Gigler, who preferred Something Analog and Lupula.)
The stage was set for a storybook final: The heavyweight favorite, Lustra, against the plucky underdog, Fat Gary.
The judges sipped. They considered. And, quickly, they cast their votes.
Sometimes, Goliath beats David: Lustra was declared the champion by unanimous vote. The miracle run by Fat Gary finally came to an end.
While any bracket must inevitably result in one champion standing tall among its fallen contenders, the Table Beer Bracket contained nothing but admirable brews. “A really nice selection,” RaeLynn said. Dan agreed: “Quality field.” Page took a moment to gather photos with her fellow judges and finish favored brews. This writer, noting that such good beer shouldn’t go to waste, selected several cans to polish off.
As Lustra celebrated — as much as an inanimate can of beer can — eyes turned to next year’s competition, which will assuredly feature 16 equally worthy competitors. And, more immediately, to securing six-packs of these excellent beers before the actual tournament begins in a few weeks.
Meet the Beers
- A – Something Analog, German Style Pilsner – New France Brewing
- B – Everyday Pilsner – East End Brewing
- C – True Pilsner – Hitchhiker Brewing
- D – Samo Pilsner – Lolev Brewing
- E – Pilsner, German Style Lager – Dancing Gnome
- F – Big 2 Hop Years, American Pale Ale – East End Brewing
- G – The Iconolast, Pale Ale – New France Brewing
- H – Lustra, Pale Ale – Dancing Gnome
- I – Squish, Hazy Pale Ale – Cinderlands
- J – Fat Gary, English Brown Ale – East End Brewing
- K – New Cult, NE Style IPA – 11th Hour Brewing
- L – Bane of Existence, IPA – Hitchhiker Brewing
- M – Lupula, IPA – Lolev Beer
- N – Hazedelic Juice Grenade, IPA – Grist House
- O – Original Nocturnal Rainbow, Coffee Milk Stout – 11th Hour Brewing
- P – Udderly Baked, Brownie Batter Milk Stout – Grist House
Story by Sean Collier
Photography by Kylie Thomas
Production by Star Laliberte
Sponsored by Arsenal Beer Emporium
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